Smart employers everywhere are ingeniously playing on the fears of the vulnerable unemployed by offering the opportunity to work for nothing for up to six months doing all the bitch-work in the office that no-one else can be arsed to do.

As the unemployment rate in Britain hit a 12-year high of 2.26 million the pressure on people who have lost their jobs and graduates yet to enter the workplace, to find any kind of work is leading them to believe that the internships available in the ‘office admin’ department of businesses might really lead somewhere.

With the economy continuing to hurt companies big and small, employers are realising they can abuse the paranioa of the unemployed by offering them the “chance of becoming part of the team after just six months of wiping the boss’ arse and dealing with that shit of a faxing machine.”

Brian Dwead of the Employer’s Alliance told us, “Smart companies are now realising that in rough fiscal times they can simply make desperate people do all their work under the guise of an internship instead of dealing with all that wage and tax silliness. Many CEO’s have told me that they are making more money now by employing what the industry is calling ‘middle class slaves’ than they ever did when the economy was booming.”