Jacqui Smith is to step down from her post as Home Secretary after deciding that the job was inhibiting her ability to watch porn for four to six hours a day.

Smith has also admitted to fellow members of the cabinet that the recent examinations of MPs’ expenses has meant that she has had to spend hundreds of pounds of her own money on pay-per-view channels. Smith is said to be resigning to free up time to explore the Internet for sites where she can feed her porn habit for free.

Smith’s departure has been greeted with a mixture of joy and sorrow from fellow Labour MP’s. Many felt that her authority had been tainted after it was discovered that she was a lying, stealing pervert, whilst other, less hypocritical, members of Parliament, recognise that she exemplifies the general moral character of politicians everywhere.

Smith will primarily be remembered for trying to weasel as much money as possible out of the tax payer by claiming expenses on everything from the bathplug at her sisters home, to the Girls Gone Wild: Acapulco Special DVD, while doing very little to benefit Great Britain.

While Smith will remain an icon for being the first woman to hold the Home Secretary position, the fact that she has given men everywhere a reason to suspect even the most respected women of being secret Sunday sex-pests may hinder her legacy.