The epic finale of the Lost television series ended controversially yesterday as the infamous island was revealed to be a metaphysical embodiment of the eternal disappointment of television viewers.

As the adventures of the castaways came to the ultimate conclusion the worst fears of many fans were realised as the show revealed that the island was simply a manifestation of their delusional desire for a complete and rounded ending to a network television series.

In the penultimate scene of the episode Jack’s dead father revealed to his son that the island had acted as a place where viewers could allow their imaginations to run wild, before being crushed by a nonsensical storyline that completely disregarded almost the entire series.

Showrunner Damon Lindelof told Cultsha, “The Island really acts as a metaphor for real life.
You can dream, love and fantasize, but eventually your going to die disappointed while staring at a stained glass rendition of a donkey wheel. Many of the viewers lived their lives vicariously through the show and the development of the mysteries, but in reality it was always going to come down to magic golden hole in the ground, giant mystical cork and everyone in some sort of faux afterlife where they can give birth. How could it not?”

Fans have protested the eventual outcome by beginning a petition for a new show that will revolve around Hurley and Ben’s rule of the island. An executive for ABC declined to confirm or deny the possibility of a spin-off series but did explain that the network was willing to continue “feeding punishment to the glutinous masses.”

JJ Abrams also revealed that his infamous pitch to ABC always intended for the island to represent the futility of hoping that professional television writers have any clue what they’re doing, “It was the ultimate ruse. Everybody was up in the internets talking about how it was a moon and all kinds of nonsense, and then, BOOM, we reveal that it’s really the opposite of anything you had ever hoped. In fact it’s the place that you send your six years of hopeful affirmations about the eventual pay-off to disappear into the magical golden hole of sadness.”

Upset internet forum fan HurleysButterfly489 explained how the episode left him feeling, ‘A few episodes back I figured the whole thing would end with Jacob and Jack staying up all night weaving tapestry and discussing how to keep an infinite 5 o’clock shadow in latin. Even that would have been better than the whole lets-lift-the-cork-of-rock-out-of-the-hole-and-then-put-it-back-in-bait-and-switch-timekiller-before-telling-us-everyone’s-now-dead-and-we should-stop-believing-in-TV-because-at-the-end-of-the-day-no-one-cares-about-your-ridiculous-magnet-theory.”

He continued, “I was always willing to believe whatever they told me, but to find out that the island simply represents a meta construct that subverts my hopes and dreams, well I just wish that six years ago i’d stuck with CSI:NY.”