In a television event that he hopes will rival the Superbowl for drama, risk and outlandish Bud Light commercials, Barack Obama will today host Health Care Reformapalooza 2010

The live TV summit on healthcare will pit the GOP Obstructionists and against their main rivals the Democrat Dead Horse Beaters in a fearsome battle to reform healthcare in America.

The long contested match will feature some of the biggest names from both sides, with perpetually retiring/not retiring John McCain set to lead the GOP against the rookie Obama in his first season as starting Commander-in-Chief.

The GOP are expected to stick to a tiresome game plan that will frustrate the Democrats and eventually grind them into defeat, while the Democrats seem to be hoping that the big stage will cause the Republican players to crumble under the pressure.

Pre-match mind-games have led to the GOP suggesting the the venue for meeting, a table, is an unfair shape and suited to the needs of the Democrats. Speculation that the room was modeled on those where the infamous death panels would be held are unconfirmed.

A leading Democrat told that he expects his team to come out guns blazing; “What i’m hoping is that Big O starts shooting down Cantor, McConnell and Boehner with the same cockiness he had at the GOP retreat, except this time Biden’s thrown in on the side droppin bombs too. At this point it’s more important that Obama yells at the GOP instead of actually accomplishing something in his remaining three years.”

Supporters of the two teams gathered early outside of Balri House and unfuled banners encouraging their teams. One enthusiastic fan had hand sewn a twelve foot banner that read ‘WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO REALIZE DEMOCRATS ARE THE DEVIL?’

Fox Television commentator for the event Ed Stevens had this to say: “This is a big one. A quick, seat-of-your-pants six hours of Barack Obama going toe-to-toe with people who have no interest in his agenda and simply want to see him look impotent on the field. If you want the excitement of watching a man’s political goodwill expertly suffocated by a team of die-hard veterans who know every trick in the book, and you have six hours to spare on a Thursday afternoon, then this is the game to watch.”