Tag archive for ‘Obama’
Obama Thrilled About Adopting Inescapable Doom of NHS
Barack Obama today hailed the inevitable adoption of healthcare reform within the United States, saying he was looking forward to a future in which the “welfare mentality led people to blame the State for their every woe.” Obama, talking about the Congressional vote on Sunday where it is expected that the Democrats will use their [...]
Obama Gears Up for Health Care Reformapalooza 2010
In a television event that he hopes will rival the Superbowl for drama, risk and outlandish Bud Light commercials, Barack Obama will today host Health Care Reformapalooza 2010 The live TV summit on healthcare will pit the GOP Obstructionists and against their main rivals the Democrat Dead Horse Beaters in a fearsome battle to reform [...]
Rio Pickpockets Olympics; Lula Excited About Extra Change
After a hard-fought battle between President Obama and practically everyone else in Copenhagen, Denmark, the 2016 Olympic Games were awarded to Rio, heralding the first time the event will be held in a South American country. Wealth, technology and infrastructure have been put on the backburner in hopes that Rio’s unrivaled ‘happiness’ will translate into [...]
(Migrant) Aliens to Reclaim U.S. and A. for the Britons
Saturday, July 4th, marks the 233rd annual – and final – festival of wicked awesome WalMart-sponsored independence for the Yankees. However, by this time next year America is set to be nothing more than a British colonial outpost once again – as scores of U.K.-homeland-adopting Polish migrants have been signed up to pilot rather large [...]
Her Majesty Cut From Supporting Cast in French ‘Saving Private Ryan’ Remake
Queen Elizabeth II, Commander in Chief of Britain’s imperially-oppressive Commonwealth, has this week seen her Hollywood dreams dashed after her prior casting as an extra in the upcoming filming of a flick to commemorate the 65th anniversary of the day the English, Americans, Canadians and even the Aussie’s saved the French from occupying Nazi forces [...]
Obama ‘Excited’ About American Sovereignty
Recent news that Barack Obama has been flirting with extremist leaders from around the world, had been presumed to be an effort on the part of his administration to re-establish a sympathetic perception of America’s foreign policy. Turns out he was just picking up tips on how to dominate a people… The dramatic defection of [...]
US Threatens Sanctions on Well Groomed Beards in Iran
Having recently attempted to quell the fires of US-directed dissent in Iran, by offering a slightly brittle-looking olive branch to the country’s leadership, the Obama administration has altered it position slightly in the face of pressure from the American public. Since Obama’s day-time broadcast on Iranian television, where he offered the country a “new beginning,” [...]
G-20 Protests, Day 2: No Storm; All Teacup
LONDON: The world was watching with bated breath. The really big, and really important, wigs were in town for ‘Financial Fools Day’. Anarchy was predicted to run riot on the streets of our nation’s capital; “When the time comes blood will run,” the Liberal Democrats kept reminding us at every available opportunity. Hippies were supposed [...]
US Carmakers Terrified of Change Balk at Cost Cutting Demands
Change is always bad. Everyone knows that. Stagnation is the key to efficiency and productivity. As long as everyone has enough Peruvian Coffee in their system everything normally is fine. Which is why Captain Obama, saviour of socialism, demanding that US carmakers find a way to cut costs is simply ridiculous. Wait… President Barack Obama [...]
Iran Confused by Obama’s Olive Branch: Uses it to Self-Flagellate
We’ve gone on a bit about President Obama’s propensity for violence on this site. Honestly we do very little research and assumed that because he was from Chicago he must have been all about racketerring and blowing shit up with Tommy guns. But he went and proved us wrong today by adressing the Iranian [...]
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